You know you have IgA when..
1. You are the only one who knows what IgA is in a roomful of people.
2. All the nurses stand around and stare at your really red urine in a
specimen cup.
3. The Nurses say to each other in the ER "Take a look at this." Like it
is a really cool case.
4. You sleep more than your teenager.
5. You know where the kidneys are located.
6. the lab knows you by first name
7. Every time you have a cold you feel like hell and you pee coca cola
for about a week.
8. You can take a gadzillion pills a day.
9. You no longer wince when you get a needle poke for a blood draw.
10. You get UTI's more than you pay your bills a month
11. You know more about your own disease than the ER doctor.
12. You have a heating pad in the bed for the flank pain crisis.
13. if there is a decent distillation procedure, u can set it up at home
and make protein supplements for bodybuilders :D everytime u take a
leak.
nice way to make money aint it?
14. You forget to flush and your kids think you put cleaner in the
toilet
because of all the bubbles.
15. People look at you in amazement when you tell them you only have X%
function left, and they don't believe you because you look so good
16. You could probably draw your own blood faster than the lab tech.
17. You've mapped out where the dialysis centers are for future
vacations...just in case.
18. Your husband/wife points out a dialysis center on the way to a
frequently visited vacation spot and comments on how it would be a
convenient rest stop on your future trips
19. You are happy to feel like crud because it means your kidneys are
still
working
20. You scare paramedics by saying "If you give me saline solution I
will
punch you" :-)
21. Your pharmacist yells your first name with a hearty "Hi" like you
were
an old friend as you approach the counter
22. You avoid cameras and mirrors until the "moon face" goes away
23. You want to wear a shirt that says "No I'm not fat I'm on
Prednisone"
24. You know you're post transplant when you pee, see lots'a bubbles and
almost pee your pants, then remember that your husband just used the
toilet bowl cleaner
25. Your face is always in the toilet wondering what your urine will
look and smell like after you pee
26. You know a Pic line is not a part of the male anatomy
27. You wonder if all the advts for potassium are a hoax (everything
seems to have it anyway).
28. You realize urinating is a priviledge...not a dirty thing.
29. You imagine what can 'affect' the lab results whenever you do not
like what you hear.
30. You still hope you will be on the 50% of those who do not make it
to ESRD...even when your creatinine is 4
31. You remind yourself of statement in this group that "if we had to
get a kidney disease...IGAN is the least worst option"
32. You think an artificial kidney will be invented by the time you go on
ESRD.
33. You pray deeply for some stem cells lurking around to activate and
go become kidneys.
34 Your kids have spent their birthdays and Christmas Day opening presents
in the hospital while you are hooked up to an IV and other machines. You try
to hide the equipment lines and your ratty hospital hair for the special
family Christmas pictures that year.
35. Your kids say they want to bring you in for science class.
99. You realize you can't take life, health and in general anything, for
granted.
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